6 weeks and a name later....

Hi friends- my lack of blogging sums up most of what the last month has been like- VERY BUSY. First of all, Everette and I decided that as much as we didn't want to go through the hassle of changing her name, she just isn't Annie to us. We have been calling her choo choo- and tried Annie choo choo for a while- but we have changed her name to Katherine Song Herring- calling her Katie. (Kate was our second choice after Annie- so we(ev) compromised w/ Katie:)) Sorry for the confusion!

Katie is adjusting to life at the Herring household very well. She is very attached to Everette and I and loves for us to hold and play with her nonstop! She knows where everything is- art supplies, silverware, snacks, her clothes....down to her socks and shoes which she insists on putting on by herself. Ev and I are trying to simply "live" each day. 3 kids is more than 2! There are many days where we have over scheduled and it's just too much. Katie needs so much individual attention- and well deserved- but sometimes it's hard to do much else! When she needs us, our reaction is immediate to help with attachment and bonding, and we are trying to learn all her little personality quirks so we know her like we know Charlie and Edie. We have many moments of peace and calm, but we are definetly still in a transitional phase with our family and probably will be for months. She understands a lot of English- and we try to teach her new words/phrases everyday. But she grunts and yells at us all anyway! We are trying to reinforce a few phrases to help her get what she wants instead of being the servants that she yells at....up please mama/baba (dad in mandarin), help mama, thank you mama- and she is using sign language for more and please and points to objects that she wants to play with. Her speech is not that clear- but some words like "owl" she can say perfectly!

Our most time consuming aspect of taking care of her at first was that she is potty trained and will not use a diaper- so for the first 3 weeks we were sitting her on the toilet AT LEAST 30+ times a day- as she was yelling at us to clearly take her there. Too many for my back and to be parenting 2 other kids. After a week of "bathroom boot camp"- we convinced her to use the little toddler potty by herself, finally, and she is using the regular bathroom too. And, we are through with diapers! Love that!

She struggled with sleep for the 1st month- but now is sleeping mostly through the night except when she needs to go to the bathroom- one of us is sleeping with her in the guest bedroom- she's in a crib for now and seems to like it.

Charlie is still being the BEST big brother. He loves her sooo much and simply won't take no for an answer. She gets excited to see him after school everyday and sometimes even lets him comfort her if she falls down or is sad. Katie is warming up to Edie but that relationship is taking a little longer to bloom. Just yesterday they started playing a game where they cover each other with blankets on the floor and belly laugh. Baby steps.

 Pumpkin patch with cousins Costen and Safina- what a happy crew :)

                                        father duck and his ducklings searching for pumpkins

                                             both girls love to paint

                                              1st cupcake=awesome

                                                 getting ready for hello kitty bowling party :)

                                          our niece Safina and Katie- 2 months apart

                                         please don't ask me to smile again

                                         Couldn't resist including Edie's first skating experience :)

A few pics from our overall first 6 weeks! I'm SOOO behind on thank you notes but they are being written! I used to read every night for an hour and now 5 minutes after my head hits the pillow I am out. Thanks for all the wonderful meals that everyone provided - it was SO nice not to worry about cooking for the first few weeks. Without the meals I'm sure we would have been eating cereal every night!

Will try not to wait too long before the next post! Julie, Ev, Charlie, Edie and Katie

One week home and cardiology report

Hello Friends-
     It's hard to describe our first week home- in a nutshell we are all doing very well. It has been a roller coaster for sure- there were times where Annie and I were crying on the floor simply because we are "getting to know you." It is hard bringing a new person into your family at any point- and in many ways it's easier-  my body is in one piece, and our newborn is sleeping through the night. It took a few nights of misery for Annie to get on a schedule at night (with the help of melatonin and benadryl) but since last Tuesday she hasn't made a peep at night. It's hit or miss how nap/bedtime will go- she has cried more than not, but I feel that it's just a matter of getting used to schedule and saying goodnight to all the fun we'd had that day. On the other hand we just have to take the time to get to know her- unlike a newborn- she is walking, talking (in toddler Mandarin), running, playing with toys, hitting, pulling us one way and then another, grunting, and crying when things don't go as She planned. As each day passes, we breathe a bit easier, learn a little bit more about her. We are still waiting for the bottom to fall out- for the attachment issues so common with adoption to rear their ugly head- and for now I am trying  to focus on the day at hand, almost hour by hour. Mealtime is a challenge- we let her taste what we are eating, and then I have a backup meal, and then the back up, back ups meal- all of which she might or might not like. There are a handful of things that work almost every time - at least a few bites- sticky rice with pumpkin, raisins, and ramen noodles. Who can't live off of that?

         Charlie and Edie are handling her pretty well- the first few days were bad- Annie hit and slapped them both continuously, but over the course of a week that has stopped. She still grunts at them and shakes her head no- to which Charlie keeps asking- does that grunt mean no in Chinese? Yes, Charlie and in every other language too. He has become notorious for trying to parent her, pick her up, walk her across the room- we expected no less- and even with all her rejections he is resilient to win her over. I do love his patience. We'll see how long that lasts. Edie has been more cautious- keeping her distance (smart girl!) and more or less ignoring her - but when she is not with Annie she speaks very proudly of her new baby sister.
       Jetlag has been worse than Ev and I expected- but hopefully in another few days we will be back to "normal."We keep hearing that for every time zone you were off, that's how many days it takes to get back on schedule= 13 days.
     
Cardiology report:
        Annie was born with a congenital heart defect known as tetrology of fallot with secondary asd. The most serious part was the narrow entrance to her pulmonary artery that leads the blood to the heart for oxygen. She was turning blue b/c of a lack of oxygen to her body until she had surgery at 1 year in China. We saw the pediatric cardiologist at UAB on Friday morning and got a good report. He was pleased with the results of her surgery- she has 98% oxygen saturation and her VSD and ASD (holes in the walls of her heart) were repaired. They enlarged the opening of her pulmonary valve. Because of this, she has pulmonary deficiency- to be expected with this condition- but it also means she has back flow into this opening that eventually leads to overcompensation by other parts of her heart. She will have a heart echo every year until it is apparent to the cardiologist that she needs a pulmonary valve replacement. It could be needed as young as 5 or 6 or not until late adolescence. He said that currently that would most likely mean open heart surgery, but over the next 10 years he guessed most valve replacements will be done through catheterization- a non-invasive procedure.

Ok-   that's us in a nutshell-....below are pictures - from a friend who is a photographer, met us at the airport and caught Annie's Homecoming....

Thanks again for all the messages- sorry if I have not replied/returned phone calls- they are very important to us, I promise.  In that respect I do feel like I have a newborn as Annie needs a lot of one on one time. We are exhausted at the end of each day trying to keep the peace and catch up with the last 2.5 years of Annie's life! Will update in another week or so!

 love, julie, ev, charlie, edie and annie choo choo.

 awaiting grandparents.....

 excited brother and sister....

 here we come!

 my babies....

 introductions

 Annie LOVES balloons....

 mom- let's go home!

 Charlie's dream come true...

 party of 5

 Thanks Camilla and Charlotte for the banner! I missed it until I saw these photos!

 sweet friends came from Nashville

     

Sweet Home and Survival mode....

Hey friends! I wanted to kiss the ground once we landed in Birmingham. It was a LONG flight from Hong Kong to Chicago- Annie was not a happy passenger- and then we thought we might miss our flight home due to a hold up in immigration- but alas, we are finally in our beds at nights- maybe not sleeping-but it is so nice to be in a familiar place and most importantly to be back with Charlie and Edie!
We are definitely going through a transition.....2 big issues-

 1. sleep deprivation- Annie has woken up at 2 or 3am the last 3 nights ready to go for the day- we let it slide the first night- but the last 2 we have "made" her go back to sleep - which took a couple of hours and some medication. So Ev and I are ready to be back on our normal schedule but with her awake we all seem to be suffering together. :)
Those of you who know me well know that do NOT cope well with much of anything when I'm exhausted- so if you see me out and about with the 9 yard stare, or if you ask me how things are going and I start crying (happened this morning when I dropped off Edie at preschool)- please hug me and/or tell me it will all be alright! It's sort of like having baby- yet SO different an experience at the same time

 2. the trio: so Charlie and Edie have been so excited about adopting from day one. Since April we've known it would be Annie and they have anticipated her arrival with such joy....and Annie is not very excited.....yet.......about her 2 siblings. It is hard for my older kids to understand that it took her 10 days to be really comfortable with Everette and I- and that was 24/7 attention, 2 on1. Charlie is struggling with giving her any space- he loves little kids so much and just wants to help her with everything- and his rewards have mostly been pushes, shoves, grunts, and yes, 2 slaps across the face. Edie has been better about keeping her distance- I think mainly out of jealousy- she's not so sure about this whole thing- we have heard comments at least 5 times a day since we've been home about how we must love Annie more because we hold her and kiss her more - how Annie is cuter than her b/c she is smaller etc...God love them ALL! Feelings have been hurt all around and there's not a whole lot we can do right now but nestle in and experience the slow integration of a new family member that is 2 and a half and grew up across the world with no concept yet of family.

We have discovered that bathtubs may be our saving grace. Last night they all 3 climbed in our tub for at least 30 minutes and Annie for some reason was not bothered by their physical proximity. While Charlie and Edie were at school today, Annie took another 1 hour bath. So, the Herrings will be a clean bunch this fall.
Can't wait until we are sleeping. I forgot how hard things can be when you're tired. I only cried twice today so far! On a happy note- Annie likes our house and new toys and new clothes. She loves to be outside. She loves the wind blowing in her face. She does smile at our big kids, a little. And even lets Charlie hug her from time to time. And Charlie and Edie are being very brave and still brag about her to their friends and try so hard to connect with her.
It's all about patience....easier said than lived....we are doing our best. Will post pics when I have energy to download them.

Can't say enough thanks for all the smiles, good wishes, prayers, meals, playdates, phone calls and emails from friends and family- they mean SO much to us all. THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart. Love, Julie and Ev and the trio :)

Homeward Bound...flight info

Last post from China!

If you are planning to come to the airport, here is our info:   Our kids will be upstairs with my parents - if you do come would love the opportunity to see them first (and let them meet Annie)  and then meet you downstairs at baggage claim. Here is our flight info- if you are coming please check to make sure that our flights are on time...
United 896 Hong Kong to Chicago arrival 12:35pm
United 5817 Chicago to Birmingham arrival 4:47pm




Last 2 days.....

After a year and half of paperwork, we spent 45 minutes yesterday waiting for our consulate appointment, and it took them less than 5 minutes to look over it and say, "looks great! come back tomorrow for her visa." Awesome.  This is the last piece to get Annie OUT of the country- we got her Chinese passport back in Hangzhou-  when we check in with customs and immigration in Chicago, she immediately becomes a US citizen- hallelujah! We would sing from the mountain tops if our lungs weren't full of pollution :)

Visited the Guangzhou zoo yesterday, and swam at the pool after naptime. She has thrown a few tantrums- mainly when in the car. That was twice yesterday. We patted her back, told her we loved her, and she eventually quit when we got out of the car or fell asleep in the stroller (wanted to be carried at the zoo for 3 hours). Overall, we are still doing great- she is just feeling more comfortable expressing her feelings!

   That being said, we are a wee bit nervous about the 3 hour drive through the mountains from Guangzhou to Hong Kong this evening. All prayers welcome. Bless our friends who are sharing a van with us! Fingers crossed for the plane rides- she was fine earlier in the week- she didn't even flinch when we took off.

 testing the waters

train ride "around the zoo" - it went in a small circle that covered 1/100 of the zoo:)

 token panda bear- only 2 at this zoo

 in between fits a the zoo- our SAD face :(

 P.E. class just outside a school where we were shopping

Can't wait to see you all soon!!!
Here we come.................julie, everette, and Annie Choo Choo

Guangzhou update...

 Annie Choo Choo is happier everyday. She is funny, smart, curious, silly, sweet, and a little sassy. She is trusting us more and more and looking for our hands to hold (both of us at the same time) whenever she is not in her stroller. When she is feeling really brave she runs wildly all alone-  I call it the noodle run b/c her limbs and joints are so loose! She LOVES to be outside. We're pretty sure she walked on grass today for the first time (we were breaking the rules...most "lawns" are only to be seen, not touched). She had this crazy excited and surprised look on her face.

We went to the Chen Clan Temple yesterday- built by a family clan in the late 1800s to educate their family to take the national examination to earn high positions in the govt. Now it's an arts and crafts museum with different sections to explain making fans, embroidery, writing, pottery, painting etc...We then ventured to the pearl and jade markets- never seen anything like it. Imagine an entire mall, 5 floors high, where almost every store sells pearls. Are they all real? SURE! The jade was much more expensive but beautiful. Last night we ate at a tasty Malaysian restaurant...still trying new foods...still surprised at how much we like most of what we eat.

We went back for the TB test reading- a little swollen so we were concerned but they gave her the clear. We then went to a beautiful garden and rode a gondola to the top of a small mountain to see the view of the city. We didn't even take a picture. It was the New York skyline times 20, full of smog. It's weird because when we are walking around in the city we don't notice how truly awful the air quality is. Anyway- the ride up and down was enjoyable - had some ice cream with rum at the top!

Swam in the pool this afternoon- this is her 3rd time in- and the first time she really wanted to be IN the water (as opposed to watching us swim from the side with legs dangling). We are all doing great. Annie is talking more each day- she is mostly babbling in Mandarin- but says a few words like hello, bye bye, apple, banana, Charlie and Edie. She saw a little blond white boy at the pool today and shouted "Charlie!"(it sounds like jahjee)  Close enough. Everybody misses Charlie and Edie!

Overall we really can't complain about anything....except we are tired of eating out, and ready for home!

 lotus dumpling- need to learn how to make these

 Chen temple

 Writing "Charlie" in Mandarin

 check out the pearls....

 best cure for nausea- she gets carsick a lot

 NOODLE RUN!

 2012. What a great year for Choo Choo

 Hi Cory and Amanda! So close, yet....

Yes, it was HOT!


Thanks again for keeping up with us on this journey....j, e, and acc